but I've been using your favorite mug lately
the one you used for your morning coffee
then several more servings throughout the day
I know it was your favorite
not just because I saw you using it
all the time
but because
I can see the permanent coffee-stain ring
just above the cup's halfway point--
you never filled it all the way
as if maybe you felt like you didn't deserve
a full one
like how you often felt about your life
the way you struggled to feel worthy
of the kind that would
leave you so satiated that there'd be
no room left in that cup
because the contents of your joy
would aggressively bubble over
splashing on everything
and everyone in your midst
and you would never apologize
because you'd understand that
happiness is to be shared
it's supposed to flood
touch people
leave them inquiring about
whatever it is you have
that makes your cup
runneth over like that
At the bottom
on the inside
I can see the mass of scrape marks
from where you clanked and stirred your spoon
and I question how much deep contemplation
and persistent worry
were driving each rotation of your wrist
how long you sat there
with your limb
briskly spinning your java on autopilot
always no cream
barely a teaspoon of sugar
so I wonder if what you were really doing
was trying to dissolve
all your tears and fears
On the underside rim
lies the mileage evidence
where it's clear that this mug
was your cherished companion
your ally during
life's storms and celebrations
traveled with you to every corner
of 40 Terrace Drive
saw all the sights of your beautiful mind
this friendship between you two
was sacred
this vessel held your joe
and your dreams
firmly in its grasp
until the day you left it
in my care
I love the feel of the handle in my hand
sturdy and thick
like your love, reliability, and support
this mug has a density
my other mugs don't have--
I know because I pulled all of 'em
off the shelf
and did a thorough check--
they're not built like this one
they don't feel as dependable
which I guess makes sense
because in my whole life
I have never been able
to depend on anyone
more than you
Even though I don't drink coffee
I'll keep letting your mug
hold my favorite beverages
while we form our own bond
as we trek the dimensions
of my home
I'll definitely make sure
to fill it to the very top each time
to remind myself
that I'm worthy of a life
brimming with unapologetic joy
And I won't even flinch
if the contents spill over
Copyright 2022
Charlene E. Green
